In case you haven't noticed, northern California has finally made the decision to submit to Fall. Pumpkin Patches have opened, the clouds have rolled in, and my crockpot has been very pleased with its creation of soups as of late.
Fall has always been my favorite season: There is something remarkably beautiful about gloomy, rainy, and brisk days which lend itself to book-reading, tea-drinking, and the introspective pleasures of life. When I was younger (and perhaps more able to create and daydream), I read Jane Eyre every October to christen the Fall season. I could probably quote the book by heart by now, but I won't bore you with that.
I re-discovered something about myself this week; it wasn't a new discovery at all, it was just the sort of discovery you realize you always knew until you forgot.....
Here was the discovery: I die a little bit when I lack creative space. Not to be overdramatic, (but it's my blog and you're deciding to read it so... you're over it) but when I lack the ability to create, a very real part of me ceases to be as vibrant or effective as it once was. I begin to coast, losing interest, going on auto-pilot. Living through my DOING, rather than creating because it reminds me that I'm alive. It is a peculiar and fantastic thing when I able to transform my day into one which falls outside the norm of the 9-5; I become myself again. I regain humor, I regain a deeper appreciation for everything around me. The world regains its color, and my spiritual clock....ticks.
There is a very real (and somewhat reclusive) part of me that imagines a life where all I ever did was write, read, teach, think, sing, and write again. I picture myself like Jane Eyre; plain and content by the fireplace.
I am a creative person, and I need to stop being embarrassed of that. Furthermore... everyone else needs to stop telling creative people to operate more like 'them.' Listen... we don't ask you to sit and write for hours, thinking of every philosophical idea in the world. Please stop telling us what 'real' work looks like. A piece of music is just as valuable, if not more, than a spreadsheet. A pair of ballet shoes can change as many lives as professional Coach pumps. Also...when did the investment in personal relationships become 'distractions' rather than assets?
I'm not sure how to make creativity valuable to the workplace, or how to show people why it is vital... but I AM sure of this: Creativity is valuable and vital to me. I can't live in a world where I'm choosing to stifle who I am just to match everyone else's "normal."
Just trust me on this one: It will benefit EVERYONE if I am who God created me to be.
~Rachel~
